Self Control

Goals

1. Describe self-control.
   
2. Progressively improve your self-control.

What

Self-control is the ability to guide your thoughts, emotions, and actions toward what matters most to you, even when temptations, impulses, or distractions pull you in another direction.

It includes:

• Resisting impulses (like procrastination or overindulgence)
  
• Delaying gratification (choosing future benefit over present pleasure)
  
• Regulating emotions (like anger, anxiety, or frustration)
  
• Staying focused and following through on your intentions

Self-control helps you act in alignment with your best goals, values, and long-term interests.

Why

Without self-control:

• You are more likely to give in to urges, distractions, or harmful habits.
  
• You may damage your health, relationships, or reputation.
  
• You feel regret about choices that go against your values.

With self-control:

• You make better decisions, even under pressure.
  
• You build habits that support your growth and success.
  
• You gain real freedom by choosing what serves you best, not just what feels good now.

Self-control is a foundation for integrity, discipline, and peace of mind.

How to Continually Improve Self Control

Get → Apply → Grow

Get good info (some follows) → Apply it yourself → Improve your knowledge and skill in SC by applying reflective practice.

1. Clarify what matters

• Know your top goals and values.
  
• Keep your future self vivid and emotionally present.
  
• Ask: What do I want most? What kind of person do I want to be?

2. Shape your environment

• Reduce friction for good choices (make them easier).
  
• Add friction to bad choices (make them harder).
  
• Keep reminders and cues that point you toward your goals.

3. Plan ahead

• Make decisions before you’re in the heat of the moment.
  
• Use if-then plans (If X happens, I will do Y).
  
• Use rules and commitments that reflect your values.

4. Manage your inner state

• Sleep, food, and stress all affect your ability to self-regulate.
  
• Use breathing, movement, and calming techniques to reset.
  
• Name your emotions and return to clarity.

5. Train with practice

• Start small and build your self-control like a muscle.
  
• Track your progress and celebrate small wins.
  
• Reflect on slip-ups with curiosity, not shame.

6. Ask helpful questions

• What is pulling me off track right now?
  
• Is this urge helping me or hurting me?
  
• What would my wiser self choose?

Summary

Self-control is how you align your actions with your highest goals and values.
It grows stronger through clarity, structure, practice, and self-awareness.